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9/28/2016

Tim Tebow Homers On First Pitch He Sees, May Actually Be Jesus Christ

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By Uppy

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Tim Tebow is a god. In his first at bat, on the first FUCKING pitch he saw, Tim Tebow went oppo fucking taco and hit a home run to left center. I can't even begin to explain the actual necessary attributes needed to hit a professional home run, let alone go oppo. Everyone knows lefties love to pull the ball. As a lefty "college baseball player" I can assure you that pulling the ball is the easiest thing in the world. Going oppo is like pouring the milk before your cereal: it just doesn't make sense some times. Why would I hit a single to left when I can hit a double to right/right center?

Tebow going oppo to left center on his first pitch is just awesome. If he can pull this off it might be one of, if not THE most impressive sports transition ever. While every other sport is more physically taxing and athletically challenging than baseball, baseball requires such an unique set of skills to excel that going a decade without playing and then going yard on your first pitch is something only God can make happen. Is Tebow literally Jesus? I say... maybe. I need this man to touch my forehead and bless me. I'm all in on Tebow. Hated him as a QB but love him as an outfielder and our lord and savior Jesus Christ. He's a literal angel in the outfield. Oh the analogies that I can make if he reaches the New York Mets MLB team. I can only pray. 

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